Do you feel tired and unhappy with your life? Does everything seems to be out of place and control? Does circumstance makes you feel stressed and worried? Does it give you this great desire to just yell as loud as you can?
One of the great wisdom I’ve learned in life is that:
Life is 90% choice and 10% chance.
Almost everything in life is within our control because we are in control of our mind and ourselves. Although we cannot exactly control the circumstances or other people, but we can control how we will respond or react towards it.
A great book on habit I’d like to recommend is written by Stephen Covey, “7 Habits of Highly Effective People”. The book talks about 7 principles that could change how you respond towards life, and how to better deal with circumstances or people.
The First Habit Talks About Being Proactive
For majority of people, proactive means performers and initiators. But to define more accurately, proactive person is someone who are responsible for their own lives. Their behavior is a function of decisions, not of conditions. They can carry their own weather, whether it rains or shines have no difference to them. A proactive individual is similar to someone with high EQ (Emotional quotient). Those people are those with ability to understand and manage one’s own emotions and circumstances.
On the other hand, the opposite of proactive is reactive. Reactive are more concerned of feelings. They feel like a victim of someone else’s behavior which caused their circumstance. They blame everyone and everything for their circumstance except one-self.
In life, there are circumstances grouped into two:
Concern is something that we don’t have control of while Influence is something that we can control. Concern includes annoying people, low pay, and all other bad circumstances while influence is more about our attitude.
In any negative and difficult situation, the best you can do is t0 choose and focus on what you can influence. Instead of mourning and complaining of others and the circumstance, it’s better to concentrate on what you can control, that’s yourself and your choice of action.
Life is what we make. It’s not about what happens to us, it’s how we respond to what happens to us.